Linda's Blog

Banff Mountain Film Festival

2008-03-17T00:09:00.000-07:00

Friday evening two weeks ago (that's how long it's taken me to finish this post...), I went to the Banff Mountain Film Festival, hosted by REI at the Los Altos High School Eagle Theater, with Trang. It was three hours worth of outdoor-activity films, as well as an intermission and raffle, for the purpose of fundraising for the Snowlands Network. The films shown were:

Entropy - 11 minutes of snowkiting footage. Snowkiting is snowboarding while being pulled by a kite across relatively flat snow plains. The snowkiters did lots of jumps and spins in the air. Looked pretty neat, but there probably aren't too many places you can find the right conditions for doing this! This particular film was shot in Norway.
Badgered - A cute animated short about a hibernating badger whose slumber is disturbed by a pair of raucous crows. In the end, the crows were silenced when all their feathers were stripped by means of a weapon of mass destruction going off. I think there was supposed to be some sort of environmental message, but it eluded me.
King Lines - This was the feature film for the night, and follows Chris Sharma on his various climbing adventures around the world. It mostly focused on his deep water solo project "Es Pontas" in Mallorca, Spain. Climbing is spelled "Chris Sharma", and though I recently saw this film, I loved seeing Chris Sharma in all of his glory on a big screen. My hands were sweating the entire time!
The Western Lands - Hoy - Mainly the reading of a poem accompanied by stylistic footage. It was about an old man attempting a climb on his birthday. I admit I may have started dozing off during this one...
It's Fantastic - Kayakers don't seem to have much else to do besides attempt to descend waterfalls without flipping over.
Speedriding - Para-gliding with skis?
Cross Country with The Snakes - Random band members go cross-country skiing.
Inner Balance - Uni-cyclers doing tricks.

Okay, so I lost interest commentating on the last four movies. All in all, I was pretty entertained, though I was somewhat dismayed to realize that not a single movie featured women. I think King Lines showed some clips of girls climbing (a grand total of maybe 20 seconds of footage?), but that's about it. I'm not sure what to make of that. I suppose women are probably majorly underrepresented in "extreme" outdoor sports, so perhaps I shouldn't be surprised.

I was also severely disappointed that two Lindas won raffle items, neither of them me.

The Mind and Heart Disconnect

2008-03-04T00:43:00.001-08:00

Why does it often seem that our minds are often in contention with our hearts? I know that I definitely don't need the Crunch ice cream bar on the trip home from Bishop, but my heart (or is it stomach?) calls out for it. The heart often wins.

What I'm specifically referring to is the end to my most recent relationship (number way-too-many). There are so many ways in which breaking up was absolutely the right thing to do, and I have enumerated lists with extensive supporting arguments to convince myself of this, yet I still feel hurt and sad at times. My preferred method of coping with this seems to be to blot out any reminder of the relationship. It seems that my heart relies on my mind to know what it should have feelings about, so at least there's some control. But it's impossible to not be reminded of it, and sometimes the mind gets out of control and relives the past. Thereby this blog post.

So what's with the disconnect between mind and heart? I think part of it is feeling sad over the loss of someone I was previously close to. I guess if you give a piece of your heart to someone, knowing that you shouldn't have after the fact doesn't restore that fragment back to you. For me, I think it also hurts because I know the ex is totally over it, and doesn't give a damn whether or not I'm sad or happy, enraged or indifferent. That causes hopelessness, and that's a feeling that's hard to get over.

Mostly, I'm sad about yet another failed relationship. I don't really like introducing guys to my family, only to tell them a few months later that it's over. Wouldn't it be nice if I was able to manage a relationship that lasts longer than a year? And so on.

This all goes along nicely with my quarter-life crisis though, doesn't it (more on that later)? I think my header promised to keep the emotional drama at bay, but there you go.

"... the heart's memory eliminates the bad and magnifies the good, and ... thanks to this artifice we manage to endure the burden of the past."

Love in the Time of Cholera

Digital Piano

2008-02-24T01:32:00.000-08:00

I played the piano for about five years when I was younger. The amount of effort my parents put into trying to encourage/force me to play was much greater than the effort I expended practicing. Of course more than 10 years later, this is one of my big regrets (another notable one is not speaking more Vietnamese).

Almost a year ago, I started playing again on the upright piano from my childhood at my parents' home (when I was still living there). I really wanted to learn Chopin's Nocturne #20 in C# Minor. About two months later, my parents (mostly my mom) decided they wanted to buy my sister a grand piano (she's a fairly proficient player, deserving of a grand :)). The search started at Yamaha baby grands, and somehow turned into a Model 185 Boesendorfer (6'1"). That's one thing I was pretty sad to miss out on when I moved out! I stopped playing after moving out, since I no longer had regular access to a piano... until now.

After a couple of weeks of shopping around, I became the proud owner of a Casio AP45 digital piano. I too nearly became a victim of continuously looking at better and better models of pianos (and even thought of buying a $3000+ Yamaha CLP-270 at one point), but luckily I realized that this was a *digital piano* I was buying. I could buy an acoustic upright for that amount of money o_O. The Casio AP45 has a decent sound to it, and I liked the action fairly well for a digital piano. That was the most important factor in a digital piano for me. I want the feel of the keyboard to be as similar to a real piano as possible, so as to easily be able to transition to the Boesendorfer ;) My sister has claimed it for her inheritance, but we'll see about that.

I'm currently trying to get into the habit of playing 20 minutes when I wake up in the mornings. It collected a bit of dust for a couple of weeks while I was moping over recent events in my life, but has been getting more play this past week. I'm working on Celes from FF6, which isn't a terribly difficult song, but it's pretty :)

I started writing this post in anticipation of posting it for Valentine's Day, but that didn't happen, darn! :)

moving

2007-08-30T08:53:00.000-07:00

today is a big day for me. i'm getting the keys to my first home! it's a townhouse in sunnyvale, which will put me about 7 minutes from work (without traffic), but 18 minutes from my parents' home.

i must admit to some trepidation to the transition from the nest out into the real world, but i'm also excited. i will get to have things my way! i will be able to throw out any junk that my parents might otherwise hoard. i will be able to have wild, late-night parties and sleepovers. i will have to learn to cook, and be self-sufficient. Hmm...

one of the things i'm really looking forward to is buying furniture and household items. i'm kind of anal, so i'll want everything to coordinate, but i'm up to the challenge. i've already started bidding for matching bedding on eBay :)

i've packed about half of my possession into my parents' minivan, and expect it'll take another two trips to get my shelf and desk transported. All in all, it'll be a pretty convenient move, considering it can be ongoing as i come home for visits on the weekends.

now i just need to find some roommates to help defray the cost of my mortgage!

happy halloween

2006-10-31T08:02:00.000-08:00

halloween's a useless "holiday" that makes for a good excuse to eat candy. hmm, sounds familiar... is candy the key to a successful holiday? at any rate, it's fun to bond with mommy over pumpkin carving.

one halloween in high school it rained, and while trick-or-treating we'd step on a snail every other step (*crunch*)... i assume we were stepping on slugs the rest of the time. i seemed to get through this pretty decently, even with my semi-serious phobia of slimey creatures.

did i tell you that i plan to blog only on meaningless holidays from now on? :)

love

2006-02-14T15:52:00.001-08:00

happy valentine's day :) however useless a holiday for us singles, it makes for a good excuse to eat chocolate! mmm.

what is love? i think there are many different kinds.

1. having a crush - i think this type of "love" is typically experienced by young teens (but 22-year-olds may succumb to it as well). it is probably best described as obsession: praising the wonderful qualities of the victim to anyone who will listen (willingly or unwillingly), gazing longingly at the subject's pictures for hours on end, and daydreaming about romantic encounters where the prey confesses his/her undying love for you. in my experience, crushes have never worked out for me because i end up putting the person on a pedestal, upon which i no longer have the guts to talk to him. that certainly is no basis for a real relationship, anyway.

2. being in love - this type of love is usually experienced at the onset of a relationship (during the "honeymoon" phase). everything is new and exciting, and you can't help but see good in your partner (even the habits that will eventually becoming nerve-wracking are endearing when in love ;)). this is a kind of fun emotion, but unfortunately diminishes over time. however, i think it should be a couple's goal to work towards maintaining this quality in a relationship (e.g. by regularly enjoying romantic evenings at fancy restaurants!).

3. true love - this type of love is rare and special, and must be fostered with time and committment in order to grow. i think that when you really love someone, more than anything you want to make him/her happy. you work to make things better when you have a fight. you're always there to lend a listening ear, or a shoulder to cry on. you provide moral support for his/her dreams and goals. you view a partner's flaws as qualities which make him/her unique. i think people have a tendency to prematurely believe that they feel true love towards someone. true love might just be a once-in-a-lifetime experience.

4. unconditional love - the love a parent has for a child. the love a sister has for her sister. a beautiful emotion indeed!

i think perhaps i've experienced them all.

rock climbing

2006-01-24T17:06:00.000-08:00

how do i love thee? let me count the ways...

1. obvious goals - each route presents a concrete and manageable challenge. when i finally complete a route, i know i've accomplished something, and increased my skills in some way or another. each route in and of itself can be mastered fairly quickly, which is good for someone with a short attention span (like myself). all climbs are rated, and progress is obvious (especially at the beginning of one's climbing career).

2. muscles - rock climbing helps to sculpt a sexy back and lean biceps... and let's not forget those tantalizing forearms!

3. social - bouldering is especially social. fellow climbers are friendly and encouraging, and very eager to help each other master climbs. the complete novice can climb side by side with the seasoned veteran.

4. completely distracting - no matter what's wrong in life, rock climbing helps me forget about it. it's pretty amazing actually. i've not come across any activity that makes this possible. i think it's just that when climbing, one really needs to focus on the task at hand. it's just completely physically and mentally involving.

i've only been climbing for about eight months now, but i love the sport! if anyone wants to try it out, i'd be happy to introduce you to it :) so far i've gotten aj to sign up for membership ;P

vietnam trip

2005-12-15T16:33:00.000-08:00

i'm flying out of SFO at midnight tonight to visit vietnam, my country of origin! it'll be my first time to vietnam (as well as to asia). i'm going on vacation with my family. we'll be returning on the 1st, so it's a rather short trip, but i'm sure it'll be great. we're flying via china air to taipei, then to ha noi via vietnam air. it'll take about 18 hours in all (not so much looking forward to that... need to pick out a book to bring, as well as make sure the ipod is charged).

my mom and dad haven't been back in 26 and 34 years, respectively. that's a lifetime (more than my lifetime, even)! i'm sure vietnam has changed a lot over the years. it'll be interesting to see my parents' reactions. it'll be interesting to see *my* reaction :P a coworker bluntly informed me that i would "freak out". i don't know if it'll be that bad, since i already have the advantage of actually being vietnamese and being familiar with the culture, but it will probably be quite a change. all the better!

i think mostly we intend to be tourists, but we're also going to see my grandfather (who just a couple of years ago moved back), as well as some of my parents' cousins, aunts, uncles, etc. i've never met any of them, and i don't speak vietnamese too well, so it may be a little awkward. i'm sure they'll remark on how tall i am! i think a quarter of our luggage consists of gifts for relatives. among these items are chocolates, soap, and lotion. somehow i find it odd that i'm lugging a big box of soap to vietnam. my mom tells me that they only have plain soap, and the american kind is expensive (though still cheaper than here, i'm guessing?). i'm not sure why we can't just buy american soap once we're in vietnam (and i don't think my mom has an answer either), but mom knows best! :) this is one of the things i need to figure out on this trip :P

i'm hoping to be able to upload pics onto my flickr account regularly, but i'm not sure if internet cafes will allow me to plug my memory card reader into their machines. we'll see! i'll definitely try to write in this blog though.

i'm off to finish packing :)

google holiday party 2005

2005-12-04T12:37:00.000-08:00

i went to the google holiday party (pics) in san francisco friday evening. here's the flyer for the event:

Grab your passport, pack light and join us for Jetaway!

Visit Bombay where vibrant colors, energetic dancers and intoxicating music saturate your senses.

Google McDougal's Irish pub awaits you in Dublin with rousing Irish music, silly pub trivia, televised chess championships and perhaps a glimpse of a Leprechaun!

Don't forget your singing voice in Tokyo where karaoke pods, live martial arts and a glimpse of Harajuku awaits you and your friends in our Ginza district.

After the cool, modern edge of Tokyo come visit Brazil and relax in our sunny park, listen to Brazilian music and play a little soccer with some of Brazil's best!

London's ultra-hip, invitation-only Underground club rounds out your fantastic trip. Venture in the deserted subway station, where the DJ's will be battling, street dancers performing and the bass is thumping as you dance the night away.

it was a good time, though we arrived at 10pm (party ended at 12am), and missed out on a bit of the food (the sushi was supposedly good). the after-party at club q was a bit lacking, but an adventure nonetheless. thanks for the invite, dave!

goodbye, joerg!

2005-12-02T14:42:00.000-08:00

today was joerg's last day at almaden. he was the first person i worked with when i started with webfountain. he's a great guy in more ways than i could say, and it's kind of surprising how sad i am to see him go. there have been many people leaving IBM for yahoo! and google the past year, but none that i really personally knew. i never expected to feel emotional about seeing a coworker leave. i guess i always subconciously thought of work as a necessity, something one does to put food on the table (or something like that ;)). however, i recognize how much more of a role it actually does play in my life, and especially how the people i work with influence me. in the past i've told interviewers that my ideal job is one where i can do interesting and challenging work. i now realize that the work is not nearly as important as intelligent, inspiring, passionate and generally wonderful coworkers. thanks for everything, joerg! =*)

this is how i'll remember joerg:
Joerg Meyer: any questions?
Joerg Meyer: ???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
???????????????????????????????????????????????
Joerg Meyer: had too much coffee

too many asians?

2005-11-20T23:50:00.000-08:00

the wall street journal (online) published an article titled "The New White Flight". it describes two silicon valley high schools (one of them, lynbrook, being my alma mater) with suberb academic reputations, but states that they are "losing white students as Asian students move in".

the article attributes the observed phenomenon to "white flight". in other words, white parents are purposefully avoiding the districts these high schools are in, and sending their children to schools that are less asian. young white families say they are "avoiding cupertino altogether" (not because of housing prices, of course). white parents are leaving because "the schools are too academically driven and too narrowly invested in subjects such as math and science at the expense of liberal arts and extracurriculars like sports and other personal interests" (even though almost all my classmates busted their asses participating in band, drama, speech and debate, sports, volunteer clubs, student government, etc.). one woman's son took the high school exit exam, and left the school to avoid academic pressure (not surprising, since he's now working at a pet-supply store). a monta vista graduate stated he wouldn't send his kids to his alma mater: "It was a sheltered little world that didn't bear a whole lot of resemblance to what the rest of the country is like." he recently graduated from yale. sorry to say, yale probably does not bear a whole lot of resemblance to rest of the country (the rest being full of pretty dumb people).

actually, i guess i'm being a little unfair (quoting only bits and pieces of the article and all :)). but really, what is the reason for so many darn asians at these high schools? i think it may just be that they have crazy reputations among the asian community, and so houses on the market are instantaneously snatched up by asian families at any cost. considering that there are more or less a constant number of homes available, the asian population will only rise over time.

i definitely noticed that there were a lot of asians when i was at lynbrook, but i also never thought white classmates as out of place (maybe the black students, but only because there were a grand total of maybe two). i have to admit though that going to college, i probably felt somewhat more at ease interacting with asian classmates. at the beginning, it definitely also felt a little odd that there were so few asians (~20%, compared to 50%+). however, it didn't really take long to get over that.

in conclusion:
1. i didn't know the wall street journal published such crap (maybe just the online version?).
2. i wish everything would stop being perceived as racially motivated.
3. it would admittedly be nice if lynbrook was more racially diverse (and not just because i prefer the white guys!).

my imaginary boyfriend

2005-11-18T17:43:00.000-08:00

i don't recall ever having any imaginary friends as a child, but yesterday i created an imaginary boyfriend! how pathetic can i be, you ask? very! but that's not the point.

sometimes i feel like i'm a magnet for attracting sketchy guys i couldn't possibly be interested in. take for example a certain individual from the rock climbing gym i frequent. maybe he was just being friendly, but i was kind of freaked out when he did this weird thing with his fingers on my shoulder. he insisted on giving me his number, saying that we should hang out and go climbing together, and i was obligated to at least give him my e-mail. the e-mail he sends me reads like it was written by a high schooler, and contained smileys, cliche pick-up lines, and lots of what i could only perceive as giggling. i tried to reply in a very aloof manner, but received another e-mail of the same embarrassing nature. that was when i decided it was time to snap the fingers and pull a boyfriend out of thin air. my mention of a boyfriend kept the next reply i received short and impersonal. w00t!

i've never really felt the need to do that before. is it commonplace? i'm vaguely wondering if i took the easy way out. i certainly wouldn't want someone to lie to me about having a girlfriend, so as to get me off his back. but then again, i would never shamelessly hit on a guy...! i would love to hear other people's experiences (as well as suggestions for my bf's name)! :)

coworkers

2005-11-17T10:56:00.000-08:00

i work at the IBM almaden research center, and i gotta say that some of my coworkers are exceptionally bright and hardworking. i honestly look up to them, and they are great role-models for me. it's one of the top reasons i enjoy my job.

sometimes i join them for lunch, and upon such momentous occasions, they really dish out the pearls of wisdom. just yesterday, i learned three very interesting things. apparently japan occupied egypt (not sure when), and was greatly influenced by egyptian art--to such an extent that american japanese restaurants display busts of the great pharaohs and various other sculptures of sphinxes and the like. wow.

i also received a small german lesson. it's kind of embarrassing, really, since i'm actually german (seriously though, just born there), though i suppose i can be proud of having "unlearned" the german language so thoroughly. apparently "Wachtmeister" refers not only to "table 39", but also has the quality of referring to the direction of that table. amazing.

lastly, joerg demonstrated one of his secrets for moving up through the IBM ranks. i have a lot to learn from him.

blogging

2005-11-17T10:16:00.000-08:00

i've been thinking on and off for some time now that i would like to write in a blog. seems like everyone has one these days. i'll have you know though that as a real asian, i've had a xanga blog since april 2002 ;) does it still count even if i've written a grand total of maybe 10 entries?

i've even been told that i should start writing in one. how flattering to think that at least someone is interested in the few thoughts i might have. on the other hand, i've been given the impression that only self-centered individuals would think that anyone could possibly be interested in their day-to-day activities. another complaint is that blogs are usually replete with emotional teenage drama. as my day-to-day activities can be neatly summed up in one sentence (go to work, optionally go rock climbing, play computer games/read, then sleep), and as i am no longer a teenager (though sometimes emotional), i will try to avoid such blog faux pas.

i must admit though that i personally enjoy reading about friends' daily musings, both commonplace and profound. i'm especially interested in stalking my little cousins' blogs (it's really fascinating how quickly they're growing up).

so there you have it. all entries should be read in a sarcastic tone of voice, and if you don't like what i write, too bad, i don't care. unless you're really mean about it :(