happy valentine's day :) however useless a holiday for us singles, it makes for a good excuse to eat chocolate! mmm.
what is love? i think there are many different kinds.
1. having a crush - i think this type of "love" is typically experienced by young teens (but 22-year-olds may succumb to it as well). it is probably best described as obsession: praising the wonderful qualities of the victim to anyone who will listen (willingly or unwillingly), gazing longingly at the subject's pictures for hours on end, and daydreaming about romantic encounters where the prey confesses his/her undying love for you. in my experience, crushes have never worked out for me because i end up putting the person on a pedestal, upon which i no longer have the guts to talk to him. that certainly is no basis for a real relationship, anyway.
2. being in love - this type of love is usually experienced at the onset of a relationship (during the "honeymoon" phase). everything is new and exciting, and you can't help but see good in your partner (even the habits that will eventually becoming nerve-wracking are endearing when in love ;)). this is a kind of fun emotion, but unfortunately diminishes over time. however, i think it should be a couple's goal to work towards maintaining this quality in a relationship (e.g. by regularly enjoying romantic evenings at fancy restaurants!).
3. true love - this type of love is rare and special, and must be fostered with time and committment in order to grow. i think that when you really love someone, more than anything you want to make him/her happy. you work to make things better when you have a fight. you're always there to lend a listening ear, or a shoulder to cry on. you provide moral support for his/her dreams and goals. you view a partner's flaws as qualities which make him/her unique. i think people have a tendency to prematurely believe that they feel true love towards someone. true love might just be a once-in-a-lifetime experience.
4. unconditional love - the love a parent has for a child. the love a sister has for her sister. a beautiful emotion indeed!
i think perhaps i've experienced them all.
A very originally-titled blog where I'll try to keep the emotional drama at bay, and objectively and sarcastically rant instead.
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- "... the heart's memory eliminates the bad and magnifies the good, and ... thanks to this artifice we manage to endure the burden of the past."
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- Name: Linda
- Location: Sunnyvale, CA
3 comments:
For valentines day I took my lady friend out to a fancy thai restaurant that had a waterfall and everything. I ordered the noddle pad thai with shrimp and chicken and specifically requested no peanuts (being as though i'm somewhat allergic to them). The order came and it was really delicious and at first I didn't notice the peanuts since it was so tasty. Half way through the dish I started to feel quite queezy and allergic. So after I paid the 70 dollar check, we went outside and I procedeed to regurgitate the most expensive pad thai I ever had. =)
Tina took it too far, but she had a point: love is not all there is to it. You also need respect, patience, compassion, sacrifice, and something as "simple" as a reasonable opportunity. You can have one half without the other, but given how rare the former is, it is particularly unfortunate when you have that but not the latter. A successful relationship requires a firm conviction that being with the other person is what you want most - and a willingness to then act on this conviction. Perhaps that takes some of the romanticism out of it, but those are my 2/100 at any rate.
good point, haakon. love by itself does not make for a relationship. i would say that respect, patience, compassion and sacrifice do come as a result of love, though. if those things aren't present, i suppose it might not be "true love".
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